Do you find yourself always wishing for things to be better, for people to be nicer, wishing to be appreciated but often picking friends and ending up in situations where you are treated badly? Do you find that it’s not easy to do nice things for yourself but you will work tirelessly to take care of others? Do you find that you do some of these things (probably with love) and still feel resentful—or that something is missing?

If so, then showing people how to respect your boundaries could help you change this.

We’ve all been faced with the inability to say “no,” even when we know we should, where we find ourselves trapped in situations wondering how on earth we’ve gotten ourselves into them in the first place.
So, how do we learn to be authentic with our “yes” and “no” responses without compromising our integrity and alienating others?
If we say yes when we should say no, we’re most likely undermining ourselves.

We’ve all been faced with the inability to say “no,” even when we know we should, where we find ourselves trapped in situations wondering how on earth we’ve gotten ourselves into them in the first place.
So, how do we learn to be authentic with our “yes” and “no” responses without compromising our integrity and alienating others?
If we say yes when we should say no, we’re most likely undermining ourselves.

Distinguishing between being worthy and being arrogant

In my work I often encourage my clients to show up and be worthy, to recognize that they have worth just by being, to embrace their talents and to celebrate their achievements. I suggest to them that they should value their uniqueness and amazingness and be saturated in it. This way, when others recognise your worth, it is a bonus; if they never recognise your worth, then it is also okay, because you are recognising your own worth. Most often, the response is something along these lines: "You're saying that I need to know my worth and see myself as amazing? Won't I be arrogant if I do this?

This then leads to the discussion of arrogance versus celebrating the self and self-worth. Arrogance is most often a mask for insecurity and self-doubt. Arrogance is very likely the facade that you are better than what even you think you are. Arrogant people often disregard others in their attempt to appear important/clever/better. Someone who shows up worthy and who celebrates their amazingness, would never need to be arrogant as there it is often a private experience, that is more than likely seen by others, as it is an attitude, a loving one, a confident one, one which indicates that one is happy with oneself,a Ned that one knows one's worth.

So, to all of you out there who feel that you're afraid to celebrate yourselves because you don't want to appear arrogant, trust me, the people who experience you, more than likely know and feel the difference between the two. Arrogance makes most of us feel uncomfortable, whereas confidence makes us want the same for ourselves.